01
Rent that doesn't bite
Housing should not require selling a kidney, a future, or your last shred of optimism.
· Party Launch· Vol. 01 · Edition 001· Filed under: Satire· We are the original ones · cockroachjanta.org· HQ: The Internet
Party Launch · Live since yesterday
A party
for the
unsquashable.
We crawl through cracks the system swears don't exist. No funding. No favours. No fear. Just five demands and an uncomfortable amount of survival instinct.
5
Demands
0
Corporate Donors
∞
Patience
1
Founder, no PA
Official Poster · No. 001★ ★ ★ ★ ★
"You cannot squash
a movement."
Vol. 01APPROVED2026
Together We Survive ✦Stronger Together ✦Unity · Resilience · Progress ✦You Cannot Squash A Movement ✦Crawl. Multiply. Endure. ✦Together We Survive ✦Stronger Together ✦Unity · Resilience · Progress ✦You Cannot Squash A Movement ✦Crawl. Multiply. Endure. ✦Together We Survive ✦Stronger Together ✦Unity · Resilience · Progress ✦You Cannot Squash A Movement ✦Crawl. Multiply. Endure. ✦
Chapter 01 · The Vision
Our movement's vision.
We believe in the dignity of those who refuse to disappear. In citizens who outlast empires. In the boring, beautiful persistence of people who simply will not leave.
Mission Statement
To build a politics that doesn't flinch — one that survives the boot, the bulldozer, and the boardroom. We are not loud. We are not new. We are simply still here.
Signed— The Convenor
Chapter 02 · Document of Demands
The Manifesto.
02
Air worth inhaling
Clean air is not a luxury good. Stop pricing the atmosphere like a brunch menu.
03
Work without worship
Forty hours, not forty hostages. The grind is not a personality.
04
Healthcare without paperwork
If staying alive requires a spreadsheet, we have failed at being a society.
05
Politicians on a leash
Accountability, recall, and an embarrassing public hearing every fiscal year.
Chapter 03 · Membership
Are you eligible to join?
REQ / 01
A pulse, ideally
We accept the tired, the broke, the unbothered. Bring your own opinions.
REQ / 02
Mild disrespect for power
If you've ever side-eyed a minister, congratulations — you qualify.
REQ / 03
Capacity for satire
We take our jokes seriously and our politicians lightly.
REQ / 04
No corporate fealty
Sponsorship from your employer's PR team will be politely declined.
Join the Party →
Membership is free, lifelong, and revocable only by you.
Chapter 04 · Correspondence
Connect with us.
Send a letter, a rant, a manifesto of your own. We read everything. We reply to most things. We ignore polite suggestions to soften our tone.
- hello@roachparty.org
- Press
- press@roachparty.org
- Headquarters
- A crack in the wall, Earth
- Convenor
- Anonymous, by design